Title: Most Beautiful Attire

Intro: Aruna would like to share with us about one of her greatest assets. Some of the content of her speech is taken from the famous book, “How To Win Friends and Influence People”, by “Dale Carnegie.”

Speech:

What’s  your most beautiful attire? (pause)

This is a question asked by my twelve-year old niece in her letter to me. She wrote hear answer – “A Smile”; and  she asked me what my answer is….This is a pretty enticing question from a twelve year girl. My response to her is – “Mona – I completely concur with your opinion that a smile is the most beautiful attire anyone could ever wear.”
An expression one wears on one’s face is far more important than the clothes one wear.

I will share with you some facts about a smile, and let you decide if we all need to smile more.

Actions speak louder than words. A smile says – “I like you, you make me happy, I am glad to see you.” I am not talking about an insincere grin. No, it’s mechanical and we all resent it. I am talking about a real smile, a heart-warming smile, a smile that comes from within.

You all might have heard this – “Our environment is a reflection of us.” What happens when we smile? People will smile back at us. Smile is contagious. By smiling our attitude changes. It brings us more happiness. It’s hard to find someone smiling cheerfully, and feeling unhappy at the same time. Even if you are not feeling so happy, or not in a pleasant mood, force yourself to smile, and you will be soon happy. At least you will be happier soon than if you didn’t smile.

We all say cheese when we take photograph for someone or when someone takes photograph for us? Why? We all know that we look much better when we smile. If smiling a lot is not something natural to you, make a conscious effort to smile frequently until it becomes as natural as breathing in and breathing out.

An employment manager of a large NY department store once said, “I would hire a sales clerk who has no graduate degree, but has a pleasant smile, than a person who has a PHD degree, but a somber face.” Wow! What an enticing statement it is. What can we conclude from this? We are loosing some valuable opportunities by not smiling enough.

I receive compliments from almost everyone I meet, one time or other, that I have a beautiful smile. It’s a great asset to me. It’s a feather in my cap. Fortunately, it’s something natural to me.

A smile is a messenger of good will. It brightens the lives of those who see it. To someone under pressure, it gives hope that there is joy in the world. A smile is a better teaching device than a frown.

I like this quote so much. It’s an autograph I received twelve years back. I don’t have that autograph with me, but the words in it are written in my heart. It goes like this…
“A smile costs nothing, but enriches those who receive
Without making poor those who give.”
Enrich people around you with your beautiful smile.

Intro:
Jim Rohn has been hailed over the years as one of the most influential thinkers of our time and has helped to motivate and train an entire generation of personal development trainers as well as hundreds of executives from America's top corporations. Today Aruna would like to share with us some of the insights from one of Jim Rohn’s famous book “Leading an Inspired Life”.

Title: The Bridge between Thought and Accomplishment

Opening:
Can you think of a magic word that connects thought and accomplishment? Pause)

The magic word is …..Discipline

Like a bridge connecting two sides of a river, discipline links
Thought and accomplishment
Inspiration and achievement
Necessity and productivity

Discipline is the stepping stone for living a good life. We need discipline to form our habits. Our habits are responsible for what we become. Discipline is like a set of magic keys which opens the doors of our Health, Wealth, and Happiness and so forth.

We can achieve miracles by the simple act of disciplining ourselves to do the best we possibly can.

If achieving success is that easy, why is not everyone achieving great success? The reason ….it’s easy not to be disciplined too. It’s easy not to do the things which will lead us to success.

Man looks at an undisciplined day, and mistakenly concludes that no great harm has been done. But add up those days to make a year – and then add up those years to make up a lifetime. It will become apparent how repeating small failures can easily turn our life into a major disaster.

I came up with this analogy. Small bricks of failures over a period of lifetime build into a tower of failure, which ultimately collapses. On the other hand, small bricks of success, small deeds of disciplined activities over a period build into a Giant Success Tower, which flourishes and creates our fortune.

Discipline does many things. But, the most important of all is what it does for our mind-set. It makes us feel better about ourselves. Even the slightest discipline can have incredible effect on your attitude. Discipline helps us to focus on our goals.

You don’t need to start BIG. Start with simple disciplines, such as:
Waking up with your opportunity clock
Getting to work on time
Making your bed everyday soon after getting up
Eating an apple a day

You can’t believe how much it boosts your self-esteem and self-confidence. Everything we do affects everything else. Every new discipline affects every other discipline. Every new thing you try affects the rest of your performance.

The same is true even with lack of discipline. Every lack of discipline affects every other discipline. Every failure, no matter how small, affects the rest of your performance.

Conclusion:
Break the rut of procrastination or lack of discipline and start today forming new disciplines u possibly can. It doesn’t matter how small they are. What matters is that you set up these new disciplines, and stay with them.

With consistent discipline applied to every aspect of our lives, we can discover untold miracles and unique possibilities and opportunities. I encourage everyone to set up some new disciplines today. I look forward to hearing to your stories of the effects of your new disciplines.

Driving force of our life:

 Do you ever sit back and contemplate, “What is the driving force for my life?”

Is it to take care of your family, to be a benefactor to the society, to bring an advancement in technology for a comfortable living? Whatever your answer is, it’s ultimately geared towards one or more of your relationships – personal, family, extended family, society, community…

 Everything we do is centered around relationships. We eat to take care of ourselves. We work to take care of our living, and our family. We come to toastmasters to improve our communication skills.

 Relationships are the most important part of our life. We need to take a proactive role to improve our relationships, make them meaningful, and worthwhile. Building relationships is a skill that we all need to master.

 I will here focus on three major points to enhance our relationships.

  Communication: Communication is the key to any relationships. Communication is to relationships what breathing is to life. We have the need to share, connect, and relate with each other. We human beings cannot live in isolation.

To build trust worthy relationships it is essential that we always speak truth. Speaking truth, being honest, and open in communication helps not only in getting our needs fulfilled, it also helps others in understanding us better.

Listen empathetically. Don’t always feel that you have to wear a Mr./Mr.Fix-It hat. All that the other person might need is to have someone to share, and listen to them empathetically. Listen with whole heart and with an intention to understand them. You will be amazed with how much the other person likes you just for being with them and hearing to them.

2. Commitment

By being committed, you will enhance your levels of self-responsibility, self-discipline, and thus self-esteem. It gives greater heights of security, sense of belonging, and draws other persons to you.

Being a person whom others can trust and rely on attracts wonderful things in our life. Communicate frequently with your most significant ones, “No matter what, I will always love you and care for you. I will be always with you when you need me.”

Love unconditionally. Always remember that everyone is unique and precious and want to be independent. Accept and love others as they are. God has blessed you with a relationship to love, to take care, and to share. Don’t take your relationships for granted, or blame or criticize the other person.

In marriage realize that two independent people are getting together not to fill in their needs, but to do things together for a sense of greater accomplishment, fun, and happiness.

3. Focus on serving others

Focus on giving. Help others to serve their needs, wants, and reach their goals. Help others to see themselves better than they are. Inspire others to find their own acres of diamonds. Enrich others. It’s impossible to enrich others lives without being enriched in the process.

 Life never seems enriched in just taking care of our self. Of course it’s our primary responsibility to take care of our self, and being happy with our self. But life becomes fuller, richer, and enriched only when we take care of someone beyond our self – spouse, children, parents, and so on. The more lives we touch and serve, the more enriched our life becomes.

With growing relationships and responsibilities, we see the stretch in ourselves beyond our wildest imagination.

Focus on giving, loving, and caring. Receiving automatically follows. Be generous. Other people would like to serve you when you meet their needs.

 No one will be willing to hear to you or help you unless you bring some personal value to him or her.

Strive to build healthy, happy, and loving relationships. It drives our life with more passion, compassion, and higher levels of fulfillment.

The Power of Giving:

 Not until Jan 29 of this year, I realized the tremendous power of giving, unconditional giving. Unconditional giving is a true blessing.

Mr.Toastmaster, Fellow Toastmasters, and distinguished guests

 It was a Sunday morning, Jan 28^th. I sat down relaxed and contemplated about unconditional giving. I decided to do one selfless act everyday during the coming week. As this thought pervaded me, I picked up my journal, jotted down Monday – Sunday, with dates beside, Jan 29^th – Feb 4^th. I left few blank lines between each day. After giving some careful thought I filled in each day with the what I intended to do.

 And here’s a copy of my journal page. Of the seven, I would now like to share two of them – Monday’s and Saturday’s,  which I are really special and had a remarkable effect on me.

 My first experience is about the sheer joy of making someone happy.

 Jackie is a lady who works in my office. I don’t interact with her with work related matters. But, I get to see her on my way to lunch, and talk in the break room occasionally. Jackie’s work area is on second floor, and mine is on 3^rd floor. We have internal stairs connecting 2^nd and 3^rd floor. Once Jackie and me along with few others got to attend a training session where we got to share about our interests and hobbies.  Jackie mentioned that she enjoys reading motivational and spiritual books. As some of you know I am an avid reader. Having common interests, we immediately got connected and from then on used to share about our interesting readings.

 When I was thinking about something to make Jackie happy, an extra copy of the book – As a Man Thinketh by James Allen quickly caught my attention. I picked the book, wrapped in a beautiful gift wrap, and kept in my handbag so that I wouldn’t forget to take it to work on Monday morning. The moment I started thinking about giving Jackie something she likes, pleasant thoughts started permeating across me. Finally it’s 12:30 in the afternoon on Monday, Jan 29^th. It’s “My Lunch Time”. It’s time when I can go and meet Jackie. With those thoughts, I chuckled gently. Got up and started walking down the stairs. Having sprained my ankle couple of times in the past, I pay caution to each of my step on stairs. So, I walked with the head bent. As I got off the stairs, I lifted my head. Jackie’s cubicle is located right in front of the steps. As I walked towards Jackie’s cubicle,I saw “Happy Birthday” decorations. Oh my God! I felt ecstatic! I couldn’t believe what I am seeing. Still in astonishment, and with half-belief approaching Jackie, I asked “Is it your Birthday?!” She answered “yes, with a blush on her face”. With a Big smile, I said “Happy Birthday Jackie!”, with a slight pause, opening my handbag, I said “I have a little something to give to you”. I took out the beautifully wrapped book gently and handed it to Jackie. I didn’t know it was your Birthday. I just thought of doing little something that makes you happy. With a tinge of puzzled look Jackie said “You are so thoughtful, and have given me so many books. I owe you so much.” Holding Jackie’s hands, I told “No Jackie, please don’t feel so. I am doing this for my own pleasure. Please do not ever feel obligated to do something. Elucidating my thoughts, ease Ned Jackie. She thanked me with a bright smile.”  I felt this act was such a true blessing to me. It rose my spirits to a high degree. Guess what, after a few weeks, one day Jackie stopped by me and said “I greatly enjoyed that book. It’s a tiny little book, but of great value. I bought one more copy of it and gave to my brother-in-law. Wow! I am on the top of Himalaya mountains now. It’s so amazing to experience the profound effects of giving something without any expectation.

 My point here is it brings you sheer joy when you make someone happy.

 The second story I would like to share is about the pleasure in expressing our sincere appreciation. I often go to a  post office in West Little Rock on Huron Lane. I think even Roger visits it. Whenever I go there, I  see each of the employee working with so much patience, no complaints, or frustration on their face even during the busiest holiday season when the queues are so lengthy almost extending until the entrance doors. I always wonder it would be so nice if everyone keep up that attitude of doing one’s work with pleasure, and no complains. As I get my turn to seek service, I usually ask “How is your day going so far!” I do all the time, every time I stand in front of a counter – either at grocery stores, or departmental stores. To my surprise, not one time I noticed someone with unpleasant face. Guess what? Almost always, I receive a response “Doing wonderful, How about you?” Wow! That response illuminates my face. I respond back it’s wonderful to hear, and I am too doing wonderful.

 I even visited other post offices, and even there I noticed the same. I noticed the same pleasant, enthusiastic response and attitude. I shared about it couple of times with my husband as well as friends. As I was pondering, I thought why not I express my sincere appreciation for their attitude directly with them, and make them feel good. And it did fit my criteria of not expecting anything in reciprocation. I went to Hallmark stores bought five blank Thank you cards. I handwrote the message “Whenever I visit you and ask you “Howz your day, you always respond “Wonderful, with a pleasant face. Your response makes my day much sunnier. Thank you for such a wonderful attitude.!” I wrote this message in each of the five cards, using my calligraphy pens, signed them, and enclosed in the envelopes.  Still I didn’t write the names, as I wasn’t sure who will be working on that day. But, I knew one person so well, as I get served by him many times. His name is “James”. No matter what, I wanted to give one of  my appreciation cards to him. So, I wrote his name both within as well as on the envelope, sticked the little crown sticker over the top to make each of them special, and that he is the king or the queen. I enclosed all the five cards in a file, along with the crown stickers, and my calligraphy pen to write each of their names. I also had an airmail envelope to mail. I headed to post office. Standing in the line I tried to notice each of the staff members names. There were three people serving that day – Paul, Regina, and Richard. As my turn came quickly, I didn’t have enough time to write their names. Hence, as I got my turn I gave my envelope for having stamps, and mailed it. I stood to the side, wrote their names, and sticked the crown stickers, and again joined the queue. As my turn arrived I approached each of them, gave the card and said, “I always feel so good and to notice your wonderful attitude of doing your work diligently with pleasure. This is my little thank you card to express my appreciation. You can’t imagine how joyful I was to see their elated faces.

 I had no idea that a simple heartfelt appreciation will bring me such immense pleasure and joy. 

 Why did I say that I didn't realize the power of giving until early this year? Did I mean that I didn't do any thoughtful things? No, I didn't mean that. The difference lies in the word "Unconditional" Giving. I confess that until early this year, I used to expect from my giving. Not that I expected a reciprocating deed or a favor, but I used to look forward to hear to an acknowledgement. For eg. I received your card. thank you. Or I received your thoughtful timely gift. When I didn't receive the feedback I was disappointed. But the moment I learned the joy of unconditional giving, I am inundated with sheer joy, happiness, and appreciation from even those whom I barely know, and from those I haven’t been in touch for years. Since I am happy with my unconditional giving, happiness is attracting me.

 Everything in universe obeys the law of cause and effect. Whatever we do is sure to return back to us in many folds. We may not receive from our recipient, or the moment we expect, but sure it will return one day, from someone, in some form.

 Experience the joy of unconditional giving. In my opinion its a true blessing.

It inundates us with health, wealth, and prosperity.

What do you see? Do you see the glass as half-full or half-empty? There is no right or wrong answer. Both the answers are logically correct. It just depends on how you perceive things. With the law of attraction, if we see it as half-full, we attract more of fullness, and if we see it as half-empty, we attract more of emptiness.

 What is the law of attraction? “We attract what we think about.” By simple shift in our thinking from half-empty to half-full we can attract fullness, richness, and abundance.

 Let me illustrate you few common examples of how law of attraction works. Let’s say you want to loose weight. The most common thing we hear from most people who want to loose weight is: I don’t want to look like this anymore. I am looking awful. By the law of attraction what happens, they will attract more of what they do not want. Instead of focusing on what we do not want, lets focus on what we want. How can we turn this sentence into empowering one? Use the phrase “ I want”. I want to weigh healthy 120lbs. Visualize yourself as healthy 120lb person. See vivid picture of you of how you want to look like. Believe and feel you are that way. Feel good. Your efforts succeed and you will be the person you want to be.

 Few other examples, instead of saying I do not want to be late to work, say I want to be on time or I want to be early to work.

Instead of I don’t want to be in debt say I want to be debt-free.

 By saying I do not want you are trying to resist against already transmitted image. It’s as if rowing against the water currents. You will find it harder and harder, and frustrating. Since it involves so much emotion and effort in fighting against, you will be attracting more of it.  Instead find the easy and the most powerful way. Paint pictures of what you really want. Visualize and feel it using all your senses. Ask for it and you will receive.

 Can I apply law of attraction to any event or situation? Of course you can. There are no limits to the universe.  Whatever we wish, universe takes it as its command and returns back the results to us. How soon are the results returned? There are no limits either to universe. When our thoughts, actions, feelings are in perfect harmony with what we want, universe almost returns instantaneous results. Delayed results just mean that the frequencies we emit aren’t matching with that of universe, and we need to get better with aligning our thoughts, acts, and feelings to what we want.

 Use the law of attraction to your advantage and to create the life you want. To reap the abundance benefits of law of attraction, it needs to fulfill the following three basic ingredients:

1. Have a clear vivid picture of what you want
2. Ask the Universe, your higher power
3. Believe, act and feel as if you already received the results

 My dad visualized the rebirth of a healthy person just as how a bare tree with no leaves, appearing lifeless turns into lively green tree. He had seen a clear picture in his mind what he wanted, he prayed God, he believed that his request is going to be fulfilled, he deeply felt with all his senses his healthy daughter. He received it. It’s law of attraction. It’s a miracle. My dad sincerely believed in the power of Universe, and he trusts that it’s God who bought me from the gates of death into this world.

 No matter don’t loose your faith. Choose positive, uplifting and inspiring thoughts. See the glass always as full, instead of empty. Not only when half, even when it is just 1% filled, or even with no drop of water. Still feel it’s going to be filled soon. That’s what my Dad did. As my blood counts started falling rapidly, he mustered more and more strength. When my body rejected blood transfusions, my dad didn’t loose hope. He came to me and said, that I tipped the deepest valley, and can go no more deeper. And the only possibility he could see is my blood counts raising up. Within few days my Doctor after discussing with panel of expert doctors, started me on combination of medicines. Guess what, my counts stopped falling down within few days, and within couple of weeks started plunging up. The law of attraction does miracles.

 What do you see? ….How about now? No matter where the water level is, always look at it as full, filling and growing. You will attract all the abundance and riches in all aspects of life.

 
Handout:

 The Law of Attraction:

We attract what we think about

 Avoid these forms                                 Use this way

1. I do not want to be overweight          I want to weigh healthy .....lbs

2. I do not want to get late to work       I want to get early to work

3. I do not want to be in debt                I want to be financially independent

 
3 Key Ingredients:

1.   Have a clear vivid picture of what you want

2.   Ask the Universe, your higher power

3.   Believe, act and feel as if you already received the results

Reference:

Secret by Rhonda Byrne